This morning Bug Boy asked for juice with his breakfast, and being the nice mommy I am, I obliged. I reached into the cabinet and pulled out...a pink cup. Here's how it went down:
BB: Moooooooom, that is a pink cup!
Me: I know, Bug Boy, it will taste the same as in every other cup.
BB: But Mooooooom!
Me: Bug Boy, we've talked about this before. There is no such thing as a "boy color" and a "girl color" in our house. I do not believe in that and neither does Daddy. Daddy has pink shirts for work. And mommy wears blue. Did you know...
BB: I know, I know, in Europe they were pink on boys.
Me: Yes, that is correct. My European friends tell me that pink is acceptable for boys there! That is how they dress their babies.
BB: Yeah, well, in PENNSYLVANIA we only put pink on girls.
This opens up a whole discussion. I have always tried to be gender neutral with the boys. Daddy cooks, mommy puts gas in the car (only when Daddy isn't with me or forgets to fill my tank, but still!) and we don't wear, "Boy and girl colors." I've never put baby blue on the boys (wretch, vomit) and if they were girls I'd try darn hard to avoid the pink, my sister was successful with the Princess until this year when she herself declared pink to be better than, gasp! Yellow! My boys have a doll house and dolls. They have pretend food and dishes. I am working a kitchen set, I've been begging my sister for it for months (she has a cool one that makes noises that she got from her SIL and Bugaboo loves it!). Bug Boy's favorite toy is a vacuum!
So where does this pink stuff come from? It is difficult to avoid. As little television as they watch I am SURE they have seen Dora or JoJo wearing pink or at least talking about it. On "boy shows" they have trucks and action. "Girl Shows" are all pink and frilly and GAG! YUCK!
Let's just say I am NOT a girly girl. I have never worn makeup (except to weddings or a very special event, and I scrub it off in about an hour). I do not wear jewelry, except for my wedding band. You have to bribe me to wear a skirt and even then it is only for church or a holiday. I think part of the problem is (besides the fact that the rest of the world is not in agreance with gender neutrality) is that in our house things appear very, well, Donna-Reed-esque. Very traditional, even though we set out to make it much different.
Now, while I agree with raising children to be neutral in some respects, I also believe strongly that there are some things that are best left to men and some things that are best left to women. I will not go into hairy detail, since it may offend some of my vast viewing audience. But I believe that BIOLOGICALLY there are some things that women are better at and some things men are better at. Take sports, for example. There are certain TYPES of sports that men excel at and there are some that women just do better. Period. And there are jobs that some women do better than men, and others that men just do better than women. No offense, it just is what it is. There are exceptions and I am not saying we should go around telling everyone, "Mj said that girls are better at ____ and boys are better at _____, so there!" My point is that each gender has qualities that make it stand out from the others. Get your mind out of the gutter, I didn't mean those!
Ding! Waffles are ready.
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3 comments:
"Yeah, well, in PENNSYLVANIA we only put pink on girls.
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ROFL! That's hiliarious!
I agree that men and women are just well, wired differently, in some aspects. But difference does not mean unequality. I'm not a fan of the baby blue, but since most of our clothes were gifts I had to roll with the punches.
That's so funny! We go through a lot of the same issues around here! For a long time after we got the boys, they had no conception of "girl stuff" vs. "boy stuff", which was great! I'm also somewhat of a tom-boy and not too girly. I do, however, wear makeup (sometimes), have long hair, do the majority of the cooking and cleaning and many other "traditionally" womanly things. I also mow the lawn, carry heavy things, drive the car, play catch, play legos, etc....
So, when my older son suddenly started saying that he couldn't play with certain toys, we had a very serious sitdown and I informed him that there's no such thing and that he could play with anything he wanted to!
I guess he took it to heart, because at services last Friday night, during the part where all the kids follow the Rabbi and the torah around the room, there was Handsome Boy (6yo), marching with the other kids while holding a babydoll in a bassinet and "feeding" her a bottle!!! So cute!
Meanwhile, Cutie Pie (4yo)last week decided that he couldn't leave the house for a party without his makeup on!
I think they understood my lecture really well! They now understand that Mommy doens't like Barbies and Bratz but they think it's fine if they do!!! LOL!
Keep up the good work, MJ!!! Your boys are getting a very good introdcution to the world!
My guys still are okay with the "girl" stuff and "boy" stuff, but Julia still INSISTS on wearing only pink and dresses. Cracks me up that this self-declared tomboy would grow up to have a girly girl!
I just hate when we go to McDonalds and people look at my boys funny because we got the "girl" toy in the happy meal because that's what they all wanted!
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