A few people have e-mailed and commented that they want to know what happened in cyberspace that would provoke me to post the entry I posted yesterday in my blog. Without going into gory, horrific detail, here is the shortest version:
I belong to a few forums (online chat-type things). I also belong to two newsgroups, kinda like Flylady where you get e-mail type things or can just read them online. The forum pages are set up more like chat. There are also news items and such to comment on. And, of course, you have a profile you can create, like in Yahoo or Blogger. I have info in the profile (used to, not now) that I was a SAHM of two boys with Autism.
Needless to say, when I commented on a few news items (one of them about children with disabilities, another about a girl with autism) people commented back in not-so-nice ways. There are people out there in the real world, who don't matter a hill-of-beans to me, that think they know the answer to EVERY problem, that their opinions are the only ones that matter, that they have the answer for everything, yada, yada, yada. You know the type. Immature, short sighted, Black-and-White, still live with their parents and sit in front of their computers all day?
And, these same people make assumptions based on the fact that; 1) I am a stay-at-home mom so I must be __________(fill in your answer here). and 2) My kids have autism, so I must be blaming the gov't and mercury contamination, I shove my kids out the door all day so I don't have to do anything but sit on my butt and eat bon-bons (which I don't even like) and watch Soap Operas (which I don't like) and the reason they act the way they do is because I don't pay any attention to them and I really just need to parent them. You know. 'Cause these people have no kids and they can tell me that stuff!
Now, there are people out there like that. I ain't one of 'em. Y'all know that. There was a gal in our group a while back who at the time had no kids (because of choice, would cramp her style, you see) and never passed up an opportunity to tell us that when she had kids they wouldn't DREAM of disobeying her, when she had kids she'd NEVER parent that way, they'd never watch tv, blah, blah, blah. She was a piece of work to begin with, so this mind set did not surprise me. Basically she thought that everything she did was God's gift to mankind. I didn't know her well personally, but trust me, I didn't want to get to know her, just based on the types of e-mails she sent. You know?
I digress. I think you get my drift. I don't care about these people, I don't know them. The people I care about I see and talk to and I take their opinions into consideration. They know me (even the ones without kids) and care about me. I listen to them.
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2 comments:
WOW!! That sucks that someone made you feel so bad. You are an awesome mom, who works really hard at it. I do know what you mean and I have felt offended and like I was attacked by a specific guy in one of groups that I belong to when he criticized my medication choice (MS group). Those groups are great because they are a soft place where different people can meet online and share their experiences, but they are not meant to be used cruelly.
One of the many dangers of being on the internets is opening yourself up for kooks to spout their opinions. I know you have taken EVERY precaution, but they still find you. Chin up! You have the right outlook about the whole thing. Water off a duck's back, dear!
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