Across the street is my favorite pizza shop. They have great white sauce pizza and fab toppings. Of course, I did not GET white sauce today, I was short on cash. I opted for plain. And while I sat there pondering the meaning of life I turned into a philosopher. There are some things that I must discover the meaning to:
- Is it Ice Tea or ICED tea? Which is it? That makes me crazy, because I always assumed it was ICED tea, since other kinds of tea are HOT tea. Hmmm...It's iced coffee, not ice coffee, right?
- How high is too high for pants to become floods? I always went with the notion that if your pants did not touch the top of your shoes they were MUCH too short. You should NOT be able to see your ankle. These are DRESS TROUSERS, kind sir. You have an awesome, trendy hair cut, designer glasses, a manicure and wingtips. Why are your pants so freakin high? Thank you.
- When you are THAT voluptuous and beautiful, why, for the love of all things holy, would you choose to wear tapered jeans? Tapered jeans are not made for ANYONE with hips. They are made for people with straight down figures. You know, sticks. Skinny Minis. People with no body fat. I saw the most beautiful woman with a gorgeous, curvy figure and a great body. She was wearing TAPERED ANKLE pants. They do not look good on anyone. Haven't you watched What Not to Wear? Think of poor Stacy and Clinton. Please get some straight leg jeans. That is all.
- When you pull into a parking spot and feed the meter, is there a chance in heck that you could park kinda in the middle of the spot instead of all the way at the back part of the spot, almost over top of the white line that marks the boundary of your spot? That way, when I pull my MINIVAN out of the same sized spot that your COMPACT car is in, I have enough room and do not have to back up four times in order to cut the wheel correctly. You were in the last spot on the corner and had plenty of room, plastic-fake-blonde-botox-addict.
- Do people outside of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania have to come to this state, drive ten miles under the speed limit, stop to let a stick roll across the street and drive with their turn signal on the entire time? I wonder if they drive like that in Maryland?
- Why does the city road crew have to pile all of the snow in the two last spots that are free. They cannot possibly put the snow in the METERED spots, now can they?
- Why do so many places have to sell chocolate milk shakes that are easily accessible. I drove by THREE places that I nearly turned into to purchase a shake. It is nearly swim suit season. Stop tempting me.
- It is abso-smurfly gorgeous outside today. My backyard has ankle-to-knee deep water and mud. I need to get the kids outside but they will be covered in mud. Please dry up quickly, like, by tomorrow. Okay?
5 comments:
Some of my reaction to that:
I believe that it is iced tea, but one thing I've learned here in Crawfish Country - you ask for "UNSWEETENED" iced tea. If not, you might get something drinkable or you might get a liquid resembling tea but tasting more like some kind of sickening sweet syrup mixture.
People in Baton Rouge RARELY use their turn signals at all, meaning that I never know if the man in front of me, pulling out of the only exit to our neighborhood onto a major highway is going right and waiting for traffic that I don't see or left waiting for the traffic I do see. Also, turning left is an adventure because is the guy coming toward me going to turn right like all the OTHER traffic headed down that road or is he really going straight into the "dead end" to my right???
I LOVE that we don't have that muddy season. That is the ONE thing I DO NOT miss about living up north. I miss snow (on Christmas day, no other day of the year except maybe watching old movies) a little, freezing rain never, and waiting until around April or May to know that the mud is gone NO EVEN A SMIDGE!
It is beautiful today! Me, Sweetness, & Josie walked down to Ritas today. YUM!!!
Yes, it's "iced tea," but a crusade to convince all restaurants of this would be hopeless. I know because I have considered doing just that.
That pizza place you're talking about is really, really good, which I discovered pretty randomly, and now you've reminded me to go there again. And I love that store, too. (For some reason you're not saying the names, so I guess I won't.)
I am a Brit so I had a little difficulty with the terminology but mostly I got it and with each statement I found myself saying,'Oh Yes, Oh Yes, Oh Yes'.
On the other side of the world but nothing much changes. Do you have the equivalent of FLAT CAP DRIVERS?
http://www.tony-holden-adlib.connectfree.co.uk/flatcaps.html
Older drivers who wear flat caps as a badge of age ,in their cars!
They drive too slow, indicate too early or not at all and at traffic lights or a roundabout because they do not pull away you wonder if they have fallen asleep or worse!
Ice Tea. In the south, Iced Tea.
Above top of shoes until just above the ankle is floods. Above ankle is cropped, midcalf is capri.
Because the fashion mags say tapered is in.
No, because that would mean thinking of others. Common response from these people, "What, like you matter?"
Yes, there are people that drive like that, but not all. Most like that come from below the canal (you know, across the Mason-Dixon Line).
Because they get paid from those metered spots :)
Because they want your money. So, don't give in - you are strong.
Ummm, can't help you with the last one......
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